Tuesday, February 22, 2011


Singles Awareness Day

Id like to take this moment to acknowledge one of the most ridiculously satisfying glasses of wine I’ve had in a long time. A friend just got back from visiting family in the US and brought me back a 2008 Black Label Claret from the Francis Ford Coppola winery. For those of you who dont know, this is the winery run by the Uncle of Nicolas Cage, and the director of Dracula. Frankly you had me at Nicolas Cage. ^_^ I’ve actually been there, but my memory of wine from the place was screamingly unimpressive. Granted, I don’t think I even liked alcohol at that point... let alone have any appreciation for wine.

Oh what the years of done.

Anyhow. Today is February 14th which evidently is but isn’t a big deal here. Moral of the story, my boss told me I need to find a girlfriend. Go figure.

To be fair... she IS just trying to find a network of lifestyle connections that would help compel me to stay in China for a longer period of time. I think it would put her capricious (not to be confused with malicious necessarily) little heart to rest if she knew I was enslaved by my own hand.

Back to the Booze though. This is a seductive dark hued wine with the depth and warmth of fresh Oregon raspberries but the soul and body of an R&B singer that weighs 250 pounds. I may never marry as long as I get to have a “weekend fling” with this bottle every couple of months.

Ok i’ll admit. Im not really bummed about being single today (hah - you thought I was going somewhere else with that). Dating has however been on my mind for the past probably two weeks. That and I’ve been watching The Big Bang Theory a lot lately and I have this secret hope in my heart that im not as inept as the particle physicist characters who can’t get women who aren’t otherwise making poor life choices...

Back to the point though. I cant decide if I think casual dating would be good for me or not. I don’t casually date. Ever.

I’ve only ever dated one person, and I didn’t even know it at the time. Im the best kind of weird (yes... I am that arrogant. {pompous font, in addition to sarcasm font are also necessary improvements to literate society})

Probably the biggest key issue for me at this point is I dont know “how” i’d do it. Most of my friends are and always have been girls since my earliest memories - aside from a few essential guy friends. The larger demographic however is most definitely female and so help me, i’d rather go to the grave than make them feel like im picking up a spear to hunt them like some douche bag wearing too much Axe spray-on “deodorant” (total misnomer...).

ok - dont have tons of battery so lets get back to this.

I’m the kind of person who has a very blurred sense of gender identity, I can go to dinner one on one with a girl without it even crossing my mind that that might in any sense be considered a date, because to me it isn’t. I can get “kicked out of the roman-catholic church drunk” and still not do anything “over-the-line” to a girl because I have boundaries that I value more than my own safety...

So that leaves me with the essential question, how would anything change in a casual dating setting.

I dont know.

I don’t know that I particularly want to compromise any of the boundaries I’ve had.

Then pragmatics kick in and say... 10 months left in this country, then on to the next. Then on to the next... and so on. I am not the kind of person who lives their life around someone else. And honestly if it came down to me getting involved with someone and changing to the point where I would WANT to stay where they are... i’d rather nip that problem in the butt now and just D.A.R.E to say now.

Still - I adore little couples when im walking around in the mall/ the rest of ... everywhere. I think its restricted to not-white couples though... white couples aren’t anywhere near as cute I think...

There are two sides at work in my mind here, and don’t go compartmentalizing me along with all the other men of the world, because I’m not them, and I am American and will get upset at being compartmentalized...

Part of me thinks it would be a genuinely healthy new experience.

The other side tells me to keep true to my original plan of waiting till I find someone that I really groove with. -- to which im sure there is a resounding chorus of “well how will you know unless you try” to which I respond... “I’ll just know” So there.

PS - what a stupid holiday ~ and it makes restaurant arrangements ridiculous, even though picnics are a MUCH better idea than a restaurant with various types of melted cheese on little pieces of bread which you have skewered with your own personal elongated two-tined fork. Unless of course that whole thing is a part of the afore mentioned picnic.

The End.

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