The RIGHT kind of Crazy

The Right Kind of Crazy

I've seen myself settling into the groove. I've actually begun to derive some
degree of pleasure from teaching these kids classes, and working half of my
contracted hours while getting paid the same... isnt too bad a deal. Though
there is a side kick to this deal.

I'm getting lazy and i've lost my passion. I dont have the interest to study, to
grow or pursue... almost anything.

I like that least of all.

So I've found myself trying to bring back passion and fire.

I think its a lot like university when I realized that I was basically
insensitive and devoid of interpersonal emotion~ and went on a quest to change
it. Lets say that by the end of my quest I was sensitive enough to be moved to
tears by Charlottes web. But the be fair it IS a moving movie.. sorry for the
redundancy.

I was thinking today, how to abandon my self-imposed duties and get back to
fanning the fire of something a bit more worth while.

Im rebelling against China within myself right now. Mostly because i dont wanna
have the same goals that essentially every chinese person has. I want something
different.

So here is my newest hair-brained scheme: go to Korea and spend all of my money
on a university program that'll take a year and a half to gain proficiency in
Korean. Study Hapkido for kicks and giggles (groan), and get some of that one
thing i've been craving for a while: Perspective. Something that doesn't exist
in this country...

After that HAHA~ I can move to one of the three major areas of China that have
large Korean populations and continue to refine my languages simultaneously
while blowing glass and teaching English.

Its brilliant I say.

The ridiculous of it made me smile. and I'm pretty sure I felt a couple
ice-chips flake of of my heart, which in and of itself is worth it. I want more
of that.

The right kind of crazy.

Love you all, Hope your well.


RE: Mum~ please post.